10 Horrible Sequels You Never Knew Existed

5. 8mm2

It’s hard…nay…downright impossible to replace Nicolas Cage. That guy is one intense actor, and when we say “intense,” we mean that his overly emphatic acting style can never be successfully emulated by anyone…ever.

And that’s why 8mm2 failed (and why no one knew about it). There was no Nicolas Cage (who starred in 8mm), and there were no references to him or his shenanigans in 8mm2. That’s because 8mm2 literally had pretty much nothing to do with the first one.

In fact, this sequel could have actually been “fine” if Sony hadn’t gotten involved because, before they did, the film was called The Velvet Side of Hell. But when Sony took over, they thought it would be a great idea to distribute it as 8mm2.

The concept was ambitious, but it failed…horribly. Because 8mm2 will forever be associated with 8mm, it will forever be rated on the same scale as 8mm (setting the bar extremely high). In other words, it made the likelihood of 8mm2 becoming a hit close to zero.

It’s quite possible that if the name hadn’t been changed, we could’ve just enjoyed it for being a crappy thriller instead of it being associated to the amazingness that is 8mm. See, the overall premise of the 8mm2 was intriguing because it involved a ménage à trois—you know, the good one (not a devil’s three-way)—and blackmail. But as a sequel, we can only see this ménage à trois as a disturbing stain on the legacy of 8mm in a rather unsettling area.

6. The Brady Bunch In The White House

Nothing can ever, ever, ever beat the purity and overall classic appeal of the TV American sitcom The Brady Bunch. It’s been culturally referenced hundreds of times across a copious amount of mediums and has more importantly been cited as being a major influence for an endless number of television shows.

But then, years after the series finale, Hollywood thought it would be a great idea to try and bring it back (and in turn, bring back the millions of original fans of The Brady Bunch) by making a film adaptation. That’s when we were all subjected to The Brady Bunch Movie in 1995 and then, again, to its sequel, The Very Brady Sequel, the following year.

While nothing like the TV show, these films were not only successes but received mostly positive praise from critics, save for The Very Brady Sequel. And that’s because the main cast starred in them. But then, along came The Brady Bunch in the White House in 2002. Sure, Shelley Long and Gary Cole were there, but the Brady kids and Alice were recast. In a way, only having part of the original cast return for this bombshell was worse than just casting everyone from scratch.

It was weird seeing Mike and Carol Brady as the parents of different children. It was as though an alien came down, abducted the original children, replaced them, and then swiped Mike and Carol’s memories, making them believe that their children’s replacements were their real offspring. It was creepy and weird and wrong.

Sure, the “purity” of the Brady family seemed legit in the…in the White House movie (Mike Brady found a lottery ticket, tried to return it to the original owner, and when that was impossible, donated it to charity, thus leading to them being invited to the White House), but that ‘70s charm was also replaced with the anything-but-innocent cacophony of the new millennium. There’s nothing adorable or pure about the 2000’s.